I think I'm
losing my own identity...
Last night I had
this confusing and weird dream...
I was walking on the street at night. It was 3:33am.
I actually stopped walking to
look at the watch and when I
raised my head forward, there was no road, no buildings, no stars, not even the
sky. I realized that the concept of space had completely vanished. I
looked back and behind me was a black cloud with tones of gray, turning everything black around it and coming in my
direction. As I tried to run from it I found myself being sucked towards a
bright red tunnel. So I stooped. I was still in the same place. I tried to move but I just couldn't
do it. Everything around me was happening so fast, but I was so slow in my
movements and my thoughts. My eyes were so wide and shiny, my face screamed
fear but I couldn't move... so I just stayed there perfectly still while a
force of somewhere was pulling me
in direction of the tunnel. When I faced
the tunnel right in front of me I only saw red. Red everywhere. All painted in
red. There was no other color. I looked back, that color was scaring me, and
all was black. An infinite black all around me and the tunnel in front . I had
nowhere else to go. Without no more choices, no more paths I took a step into
the bright red tunnel. My body was shaking intensely. I looked to see inside
the tunnel and there was two ways to go, right and left, a few steps
forward there was a wall. Instead of choosing a way to go, I just walked in
front and I passed trough the wall. It didn't
stop me. And then I got to the deep ocean... there I was... dancing with the
water. Suddenly my body contracted. I remember getting the feeling that I was
hugging something... something... it wasn't a person, it wasn't an object, not
even an animal. Cause, I couldn't see it. I could only feel it... In the top of
my fingers I felt the tickles of the tingle
so softly. It was part of me, my being... it was my soul. When I finally
realized what I was holding everything faded to black. Again, it was all
black... But I looked so peaceful, so light. Between the space of those
fragments of images, feelings and emotions my fear and anxiety were gone. And
there I was, embracing this blackness that was surrounding me and my soul, that
I was holding in my arms. Finally, after all this tornado of feelings I found
myself accepting, understanding that my soul was no longer attached to my
body... and I, was dead.